The key to pastoral ministry: know your lambs individually!

Professionals in any industry know that in order to be successful and grow your business, you must know your customer in order to provide the service or product that matches their need and provides a solution specifically for that need.

So the marketing strategy is fairly direct -- talk to the people and learn what each person needs and what your service or product can do to meet that need.

The skill that helps the professional most in determining the need is listening. And that skill is more than letting the other person talk. It means feedback and checking periodically to make sure that the underlying concern is brought out and addressed. In some circles this skill is called "Active" Listening.

If you are a professional and want to learn how well you are doing in a blunt, direct way, periodically during a conversation ask, "Do you think I'm listening to you?"

A more subtile way to simply summarize what you have heard the other person say, interprete the basis for what they are saying with a feeling, and in a tone of voice that reflects the feeling, reply to the other person's statement.

If the other person agrees with you, you know you are on track and can continue the conversation on track. If you didn't get it right, usually the other person will disagree and give you a more clear statement of their situation.

Example

Visitor: This church seems to be unfriendly.
Member: You think people in the church should try to get to know you.
Visitor: This is the second Sunday I've visited, and I still don't know anyone.
(To be continued)